Thursday, March 12, 2009

I Googled Myself

So I did a google search of myself today. Most of the results were things along the lines of "the melody frees my soul" and things like that. But there were a couple that were actually related to me. Some brought back tons of memories.  

When we lived in Phoenix we were interviewed for a newspaper article on infertility. Apparently that article was used in another article as well. If you don't want to read the whole article here is the part about us:

"As long as I can remember, all I've ever wanted was to become a mother and have lots of babies," says 26-year-old Melody Frees of Litchfield Park, in the Phoenix area of Arizona, who learned in 2002 that her fallopian tubes are blocked, leaving her infertile. "I see parents with babies, and I wonder if we will ever know the joy of having a child of our own."  .....
Mixed messages from doctors, misplaced medical files, and numerous go-rounds with insurance companies taught Frees, the Litchfield Park woman who, at 26, should be in the prime of her fertility, and her husband, Jim, to take notes, make copies of their records, ask questions, and find answers.
The Freeses tried to borrow money to pay for in vitro fertilization (IVF), but were denied, so they moved from Southern California to Litchfield Park in August 2003, found new jobs and plan to buy a home. They'll take out a second mortgage to pay for IVF, starting in 2004, and will do no more than two cycles. The cost will be about $20,000.
Finding out his wife couldn't have children without first having a tubal ligation to remove toxic fluid in the tubes that could hurt a fetus was a blow to Jim. "I'm a fixer. I need to fix things that are broken," he says. "But there was nothing I could ever say or do to turn this around and make it better."

It was interesting to read knowing what I know now. Since that time we've done 4 cycles of IVF and now have 3 children.

I also found the article in People magazine that talked about the INCIID program that allowed us to do the first two cycles. (This one only has the article. It doesn't have the pictures of us) Here is the one that has the pictures.

I remember the hopelessness of not knowing if we'd ever have babies. For Christmas one year our families got together and raised money to put into a "baby fund" for us. On the card they put this poem.

When roses lose their loveliness  
When rivers cease to flow;  
When sunlight fails to warm the air,   
When stars no longer glow.  
When birds cannot take to flight,  
When a ruby's luster fades;  
When leaves refuse to fall from boughs,  
When trees cannot give shade.  
When fields of flowers wither,  
When clouds cease making rain;  
When mountain ranges cast no shadows,   
When prairies cannot grow grain.  
When these natural wonders end,  
When there's no  dusk or dawn;  
When all life's miracles cease to be....  
...Only then will my hope be gone.   
 I'm so grateful to be where I am now. I'm so thankful for everyone who helped us get to the point we are at now. Without them we wouldn't have the beautiful family we have now.

All that reflection because I decided to google myself.


Hajar Zamzam Ismail said...

How interesting, that a portion of your history is recorded online. I bet it brought back memories and emotions that you are grateful to be able to put behind you.

Tami said...

I really don't think googling my name would be anywhere as facinating as yours! That is great, thanks for sharing.